I think by now, you can at least see that I don’t believe any of us are perfect. We all make mistakes, and we all say or do something that we wish we could take back. But I’m not sure. Well, I actually don’t believe it is the mistakes that are our downfall. I’m speaking from a leader’s point of view. We are human, and don’t get me wrong; there are people, subordinates, and peers who want to see us fail or make a mistake. They want to be that person that jumps up and says, “Aha! Got you!” So many of us do our best to be as “perfect” as possible. I don’t know about you, but I can tell you it is challenging and often not plausible.
But, what happens when we make a mistake? Unfortunately for me, and I believe there are others like me, I agonize over my mistake. I can remember a mistake I made ten years ago. Ask me something positive I did….I don’t remember. But I remember the mistake I made and how it affected my people and me. Look, I’m not a pessimist (although some may argue this), but I am a realist. I look at both sides. I cannot just believe everything is rainbows and unicorns (I think that’s one of those sayings).
However, I can promise you that I admitted to my mistake and did everything I could to fix its outcome. Luckily for me, it wasn’t something that was life or death. However, admitting to making a mistake was necessary. I had to ensure that my people did not suffer (I don’t mean physically, of course) for my decision or approach. What I did discover by admitting to my mistake were a few things.
- Being honest or transparent is a slippery slope
- It protected my people, and since that is what leadership is, it was worth the pain
- The ones who didn’t think they could trust me realized they could
- The ones who wanted to see me fail would never trust me
Okay, I know there is a bit of contradiction in what I am saying, so let me explain. There is a theory of leadership called Authentic Leadership. According to Bill George’s article “Leadership Is Authenticity, Not Style,” an authentic leader is true to themselves. It is someone who recognizes their weaknesses and accepts them. I would also argue they work on them. Here is where it gets tricky or controversial. George argued that authentic people lose their authenticity when they want to be accepted and mask or cover their weaknesses. Herminia Ibarra’s article “The Authenticity Paradox” argued that authenticity doesn’t mean that you are fully transparent where people can see through you.
So, where is the balance? If you walk into a new position and allow transparency, those who want to see you fail will look for your weaknesses. You don’t have to show them. Those unsure of you will watch you and wait for a critical moment, like admitting when you are wrong. I do believe that authenticity is essential. However, I also think that being too authentic can open the door for others to take advantage of you and the situation.
What’s the point? Be honest, admit when you are wrong, be yourself, but remember, you cannot please everyone. Some will wait and watch for your misstep. That does not mean you are a bad leader. A bad leader does not admit when they are wrong. A bad leader does not know or doesn’t recognize their weaknesses.
