There isn’t much room to do the incorrect thing. I don’t want to refer to it as the wrong thing because that implies a conscious thought of doing wrong. However, perhaps a kinder way of saying it is the incorrect thing. It can be rather exhausting and trying. Watching everything you do and say, ensuring that your messages pass to others without malice or judgment. This isn’t about morals and ethics (that is an entirely different topic we will cover later). This is about setting the example for your people to see, watch, and ultimately emulate.
Setting the example takes time, attention, and I would even go so far as to say patience. If it were simple, then there wouldn’t be a discussion about it over and over. If it were simple, researchers, writers, and experts wouldn’t have to argue that a leader must consistently set the example.
This week, in our article review, we read about Kouzes and Posner’s exemplary leadership model. At the very top, the very first step of the model is setting the example. Leaders must demonstrate through their actions how they want their people to behave. Those that are easy to anger or easy to judge may discover that their people will do the same to them. However, a leader who displays compassion, empathy, understanding, and tolerance will find that their people will likely behave the same way.
This is not to suggest that a leader can reach and please everyone. Likely (and this is my cynical side talking), there is that one or two that you will never reach. However, most of your people will recognize that the behavior is genuine, and they should exemplify your behavior.
Kouzes and Posner argued that “behavior wins respect.” This makes me reflect on the idea of “do as I say, not as I do.” Too many of us watched leaders take this stance more often than not. I’m not sure about you, but it was always disappointing for me.
If you want your people to behave a certain way, show them. If you want your people to treat others a certain way, show them. If you want your people to carry themselves a certain way, show them. Through your actions, show them.
